What can make a good parent?
A great parent is someone who strives to make choices in the best interest of the kid.
What makes a fantastic parent isn't just defined by the parent 's actions, but additionally their intention.
A great parent doesn't need to be perfect. Nobody is perfect. No child is perfect either … keeping this in your mind is important when we set the expectations of ours.
Successful parenting isn't about achieving perfection. Though it doesn't imply that we shouldn't work towards that goal. Set very high standards for ourselves first and then the children of ours next. We serve as role models that are important for them.
Top Ten Parenting Tips
Here are 10 tips that can help you be an even better parent, learn good parenting skills, and avoid bad parenting.
Some are not simple or fast.
And probably nobody can do them constantly.
While you may not always do all of these things, though the suggestions in this parenting guide can help you move in the right direction.
#1 BE A good Role MODEL
Walk the walk. Don't simply tell the child of yours everything you want them to do.
The best way to teach is to show them.
Human is a special species in part since we are able to learn by imitation. We're programmed to imitate others' actions, comprehend them, and integrate them into our own. Children, in particular, watch everything their parents do very carefully.
Thus, function as the individual you would like the child of yours to be - respect your child, show them positive behavior and attitude, have empathy towards your kid's emotion - as well as your kid will follow suit.
#2: Love THEM And Show them Through ACTION
Show your love.
There's simply no such thing as loving the child of yours too much. Loving them can't spoil them.
Just what you decide to do (or give) in the name of love can - things as material indulgence, low expectation, leniency, and over protection. When these items are provided in place of real love, that's when you will have a spoiled kid.
Loving the child of yours may be as simple as giving them hugs, spending quality time with them, having family meals together, and also hearing your child's problems seriously.
Showing these actions of love is able to trigger the release of feel good hormones like oxytocin. These neurochemicals can provide us a full sense of calm, emotional warmth, and contentment; from these, the kid, will acquire resilience and never to mention a closer relationship with you.
#3: Practice Kind And Firm POSITIVE PARENTING
Infants are born with around 100 billion brain cells (neurons) with comparatively few connections. These connections create the thoughts of ours, drive our actions, shape the personalities of ours, and basically determine who we are. They're created, strengthened, and "sculpted" through life experiences.
Give the child of yours positive family interaction, particularly in the early years. They'll then be able to experience positive experiences themselves and also offer them to others.
But if you give the child of yours negative experiences, they will not have the kind of development needed for them to thrive.
Sing that silly song. Have a tickle marathon. Go on the park. Laugh with your child. Allow them to have positive attention. Drive through an emotional tantrum with them. Solve an issue together with a positive mind-set.
These positive experiences create good neural connections into your child's brain and form the memories individuals that your kid carries for life.
When it comes to discipline, it seems difficult to remain positive, especially when dealing with behavior issues. But it is possible by using positive discipline and avoiding strong discipline.
Being a good parent means you have to teach the child of yours the morals of what is right and what's wrong.
Setting limits and being consistent is the golden rule to discipline that is good. Be kind and firm when you establish rules and enforce them. Focus on the reason for the child's misbehavior. And make it an opportunity for them to learn for the future in a positive manner, rather than to get punished for the past.
#4: Be a Safe HAVEN FOR The CHILD of yours
Tey letting your child know that you will remain there for them by being responsive to your child's signals and vulnerable to the needs of theirs. Support and accept your child as an individual. Be a warm and safe place for the child of yours to explore from and go back to.
Children raised by parents who are constantly responsive have much better emotional regulation development, social skills development, and emotional health outcomes.
#5: Talk with The CHILD of yours And Help THEIR BRAINS INTEGRATE
Many of us already know the importance of communication. Talk to your child and also listen to them thoroughly. By maintaining an open line of communication, you will have a much better relationship with your child and your child will come for you when there is an issue.
But there is an additional reason behind communication. You help your kid integrate different parts of their brain, a critical process in a kid's development.
Integration is similar to the body of ours, in which various organs should coordinate and work together to maintain a healthy body. When different parts of the brain are integrated, they are able to work harmoniously as an entire, meaning less tantrums, much more good behavior, much more empathy, and much better psychological well-being.
To accomplish that, conversation through troubling experiences. Ask your child to describe what happened and how they felt to develop attuned communication.
You don't have to offer solutions. You do not have to have all of the answers to become a good parent. Just listening to them talk. Ask clarifying questions using simple words are going to help them make sense of the experiences of theirs and integrate the memories of theirs.
#6: Reflect on Your own personal CHILDHOOD
A lot of us want to parent differently from our parents. Even those who had an excellent upbringing and a thankful childhood might want to alter some elements of the way they had been brought up.
But very often, when we open the mouths of ours, we speak the same as the own parents of ours did.
Reflecting on our own childhood is a step towards understanding why we parent how we do. Make note of things you'd like changing and think of how you'd get it done differently in a real scenario. Try to be aware and change the behavior of yours the next time those issues come up.
Don't quit if you don't succeed in the beginning. It takes practice, lots of practice to consciously alter one 's child-rearing methods.
#7: Pay attention to Your personal WELL-BEING
Parents need relief too.
Give consideration to your own well-being to avoid parental burnout.
Oftentimes, things including your own needs or maybe the health of your marriage are placed on the back burner when a child is born. When you don't pay attention to them, they are going to become bigger problems down the road. Make time to enhance your relationship with the spouse of yours.
Stressed-out parents tend to be more prone to fighting. Don't be afraid to ask for parenting help. To have some "me time" for self care and stress management is crucial to rejuvenate the mind.
How parents take care of their child physically and mentally will make a big difference in their parenting and family life. In case these two areas fail, the child of yours will suffer, too.
#8: Don't SPANK, NO MATTER WHAT
Undoubtedly, for some parents, spanking is able to bring about short term compliance which occasionally is a much-needed help for the parents.
However, this method does not teach the kid right from wrong. It only teaches the kid to fear external consequences. The child will be motivated to avoid getting caught with behavior that is inappropriate.
Spanking your child is modeling to the kid that he/she can resolve issues by violence. A child who's spanked, smacked, or maybe hit is more vulnerable to fighting along with other children. They are more likely in order to become bullies and to use verbal/physical aggression to resolve disputes.
Later on in life, they are additionally more apt to lead to delinquency and oppositional behavior, even worse parent-child relationships, mental health problems, along with domestic violence victims or abusers.
There are an assortment of more effective alternatives to discipline that have been shown to be much more effective, such as positive discipline (Tip #3 above positive reinforcement and).
#9: Keep Things In Perspective And remember YOUR PARENTING GOAL
What's your goal in raising a child?
If you are like the majority of parents, you would like your child to do well in school, be prosperous, be independent and responsible, be respectful, enjoy good associations with you and others, be caring and compassionate, and have a happy, healthy and fulfilling life.
But how much time do you spend working towards those goals?
When you are like the majority of parents, you most likely spend the majority of the time simply attempting to get through the day. As authors, Siegel and Bryson, point out in their book, The Whole-Brain child, instead of helping your child thrive, you spend most of time just trying to survive!
To not let the survival mode dominate your life, next time you feel angry or frustrated, step back. Think about what anger and frustration will do for you or your child.
Instead, find ways to switch each bad experience right into a learning opportunity for them. Even epic tantrums could be transformed into invaluable brain-sculpting moments if you focus on teaching your child, not trying to control them.
#10: Take a SHORTCUT Through the use of Findings In Latest PSYCHOLOGY And NEUROSCIENCE RESEARCH
By shortcuts, I do not mean shortchanging the child of yours with tricks. What I mean is taking advantage of what is already known by scientists.
Parenting is among the most researched fields in psychology. Lots of parenting strategies, traditions, or practices have been scientifically researched, verified, refined, or refuted.
For best parenting advice for increasing a kid and information which are supported by science, here is one of my personal favorite science based parenting books, The Science of Parenting.
Using medical knowledge is of course not really a one-size-fits-all strategy. Every child differs. Quite possibly within the best parenting style, there can be a variety of good parenting practices you could choose based on your child's temperament.
A good example is employing spanking to discipline. You will find many better alternatives, e.g. redirection, reasoning, time-in, etc. You are able to choose a non punitive discipline method that works ideal for your child.
Of course, you are able to also decide to utilize "traditional" or "old school" parenting styles (e.g. punishing or maybe spanking) and may nonetheless get a "similar" outcome.
Differential susceptibility has found us that children with various temperaments react to the quality of parenting differently.
Those who are more vulnerable to parenting quality will have much better outcomes under good parenting but even worse outcomes under bad parenting.
Those people who are much less susceptible may "turn out fine" regardless of how tough their parents treat them. Though it doesn't imply those practices are good. These children are merely lucky. They could thrive despite poor parenting, not because of it.
Why take a possibility with sub par parenting practices when you can use well-researched, better ones?
The importance of parenting can't be underestimated. https://parentinghowto.com/ Taking science-based parental advice might not be the easiest way to parent. It might require more work on the part of yours in the short term but can help you save lots of time and agony in the long term.
Final Thoughts On Parenting
The great thing is, that although parenting is difficult, it is also really rewarding. The bad part is the rewards usually come later than the hard work. But in case we try our best today, we will ultimately reap the rewards and also have nothing to regret.
To Happy Parenting!